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Archive-name: First/

Archive-author: Dave Read

Archive-title: Forest, The

I wondered again, as I had every ten minutes for the last two hours, why you 

had led me on this walk.  The forest trail was beautiful, certainly,

but you hadn't explained any further..."Let's go for a walk," was all

you said.  I was a little surprised because you hadn't spoken much to

me since you started dating Tim, and you hadn't shown any interest in

spending time with me in a year or more.  That was a very confusing

year...when your best friend for the last twelve years stops visiting,

you have to wonder what you did to drive them away.  You never would

speak to me about it, though. 

The forest was dark and quiet, crowded with thick trees that shaded

the forest floor.  Spears of sunlight shone through here & there.  I

could almost *feel* the green of the forest...the slow growth that had

been growing for centuries. The musty scent of moss permeated the air,

competing with the clean healthy smell of the natural surroundings.

The trail wound around a grove of trees, and the subliminal little

gurglings that had pestered the edge of my hearing became a little

louder, and I finally realized that the sound I had unconsciously been

trying to place was rush of a shallow stream over half-submerged

rocks.  I still couldn't see it, but I knew that stream had something

to do with our trek.  As the path led over a small hill, the sound

became abruptly louder, and I saw the stream, a lovely little brook

that wandered this way and that, as aimless as that silent walk we had

been sharing.  You turned to me, your chest-length blonde hair shining

radiantly from the small patches of afternoon sunlight that poked

through the leaves above, and said "Not much further. Maybe only ten

minutes."  Those were the first words you had said to me in almost an

hour, but what was so wonderful was merely the sound of your voice,

not the content of your words. 

I began to drift backwards in time again, thinking of all the years we

had spent together, since that first summer when your family moved in

three houses down from ours, since that lazy summer when we were 7

years old.  I had never known any friend who understood me so

completely, who comprehended the feelings and emotions I endured while

we grew up together.  When I broke up with a girlfriend, you were

always there to hold me as I sobbed, and I was there to do the same

for you when you lost your boyfriends.  I always wondered why we never

dated, but somehow I think we both knew that if *we* were to break up,

there would be no-one there to console us, which would be far worse

than the transitory pain of losing yet another lover. 

The trail followed the brook pretty closely, venturing no more than a

few feet away at any time...we were forced to go single-file because

it was so thin.  I didn't mind when you took the lead...we never did

compete at anything, I reminisced.  I also didn't mind the

were always one of the prettiest girls in school, although I was

convinced that none of your boyfriends appreciated you properly.  They

only saw the clean, well-defined features of your face, the slender

but enticing lips and your lovely pale blue eyes.  They saw your fair

skin and your feminine arms and hands (always with perfectly trimmed,

long nails, unpainted except for special occasions) and your slim

waist as objects of their desire, to be coveted for personal

satisfaction. They never knew you as I did, the shy romantic girl who

was secretly very saddened to have such an attractive body that these

'men' never slowed down long enough to love you with their minds and

hearts instead of their loins.  I can remember the pain you suffered

as each of them turned out to want exactly what all the others wanted,

and no more. 

As you walked in front of me, I had to admire your courage, wearing

that lovely light cotton sundress on this walk...the forest towered

over us like some threatening but slumbering demon, and the ground

below us was uneven and dirty. You always used to be practical about

these sorts of things!  I guess I didn't mind all that much, though,

because it showed off your figure like no hiking shorts ever

could...even though your legs were hidden beneath the flowing cotton. 

You turned your head slightly to face me as we walked, and said "It's

just ahead.  Another few yards...around that hill off to the right." 

As we neared the hill, the path led away from the stream, which made

me a little wistful...its constant muttering was very consoling in the

absence of any conversation from you.  I watched the stream recede

into the distance, and before I knew it, you were slowing down,

turning to me silently, and pointing. I followed your arm to see a

quiet little pond, maybe 30 or 40 feet across, fed at one end by a

three-foot waterfall, and draining at another into the stream we had

been following for the last ten minutes.  A narrow beach surrounded

the grotto, shaded everywhere by the same dense trees that had

sheltered our walk all the way.  Little glints of sunlight gave enough

light to see your face. Something was wrong, but I didn't know what it


I walked closer to you, to hold you so you could tell me what was

troubling you, as I had done so many times before, but as I got within

arms' reach of you, you held up your right hand, placing it gently on

my left shoulder, lightly tracing my bones and muscles.  Then you slid

it around my neck, and pulled me closer, and I found your other arm

around me, and before I knew it, i was looking down into your eyes, as

you turned your face up to heart was pounding so loud that

the rustling of the trees was drowned.  Our lips seemed drawn to each

other's without any will from us, and as they met, I knew what it was

I had been missing for so long. 

Suddenly panic washed over me, and I pulled away from you, shamed that

you could see the terror in my eyes, but I could not stop looking at

you.  You looked so hurt, as if you had gambled everything and lost. 

I stood rooted to my spot, unable to move closer or farther.  You took

a step to bridge the gap between us, and I still couldn't move as you

reached out and took my right hand in yours.  You pulled it up to your

neck, and ran the back of my hand over the skin left exposed above the

top of your dress, and then I felt an electric thrill run through me

as you turned my hand over and ran it between your breasts, and then

over one, pausing for a moment as the edge of my index finger dragged

across your nipple.  It was hard, and I saw you shudder gently when it

sprang free from my finger.  I had lost control of my hands

were slaves to yours, and I watched with silent detachment as you

pulled my hand up to the strap on your right shoulder, and slipped my

finger under it, pulling upward and to the side so that the strap

fell, limp against your arm. The bare skin exposed on your shoulder

screamed to me that there was nothing beneath the top of your dress,

and my eyes were drawn to the shape of your full breasts as I realized

that the mounds there were covered by nothing but light cotton. 

You repeated this on the left side, and I trembled with expectation,

but your dress clung to you, glued to your skin by the many beads of

perspiration that dotted your body.  You reached out with your other

hand and put both of my hands on your waist, and pushed in slightly,

and downward, sliding your dress to the ground.  As my hands passed

over the curve of your hips, I felt only smooth skin, and I realized

that there was *nothing* under your dress.  My hands shook as if

gripped in an earthquake as the last of your dress slithered away,

revealing all of your body to my hungry eyes.  It was everything I had

imagined.  The creamy white smoothness of your face covered you from

head to toe, except for the two strawberry-red circles atop your

breasts, and the tuft of light blond hair at the intersection of your


You stood there, unmoving, only a foot away from me, as I reached out,

finally able to move, and I touched your nipples again. I saw you

tremble a bit, as you reached up and pulled my right hand off of your

breast, and pulled the left one to you a bit harder.  I let you guide

my right hand downward, still caressing your breast with my left.  I

felt the softness of your hair run past my right hand as you pushed my

hand between your legs, and finally I took over, sliding my finger

gently along the edges of your lips, feeling the wetness and the heat

pouring from you.  My desire grew and grew until I thought I would

burst, but I contained it.  I still could not believe we were doing


Finally you turned away from me slowly, taking my hand from you

gently, and you pulled me towards a larger patch of the beach, and

downward to the soft mossy ground that awaited us.  You laid down

wordlessly, pulling me along.  I laid down next to you, hovering over

your body, not knowing where to start.  I ran my hands over you from

shoulder to thigh while you shivered beneath my touch, and my hand

found its way to your womanhood again, and this time a finger slipped

in, causing you to let out a short, low gasp.  I leaned my face down

to yours, and kissed you again.  As my tongue slipped gently into your

mouth, I tasted the sweetness that was your breath, and felt the soft

candy that was your tongue.  I gently slipped my finger out of you,

but not all the way, and slipped it back in, and you surged under me,

almost making our kiss break apart.  As out lips lingered against each

other, I pulled mine away from yours, and leaned farther down to kiss

your breasts.  I ran my tongue firmly around your nipple, and pressed

my lips against down firmly, sucking gently and nibbling lightly,

flicking my tongue over your nipple.  I timed the efforts with my

mouth so that they coincided with plunges of my finger, and soon I

felt your hands grasping the back of my head, pulling me against you. 

I felt your body tense more and more with each stroke, until your back 

arched and you clutched me tightly to your chest, with a rush of air 

inward and a long, trembling hug.

When you finally relaxed your grip on me, I propped myself up on my 

elbow, looking into your eyes and smiling.  You looked at me with the 

love and desire I had always wanted to see in my lovers, but had 

always missed.  "I want you," was what I heard, unbelieving.  "This 

has always been a dream of mine," you said to me.  "Make it come 

true."  I stood up slowly, and began to undress myself before you.  I 

wanted to rip my clothes off, but the feeling of happiness and the 

elegance of what you had arranged made me do it slowly.  Finally I was 

naked before you, and still not believing what was happening.  I laid 

down again beside you, wanting to prolong the moment, but as soon as I 

was settled, you reached down, taking me into your hands, pulling me 

towards our union.  I leaned over you, settling my weight onto my

hands, as you positioned my loins to enter you.  My arms shook so much 

that I almost fell.  As I felt the my tip brush against the warmth and 

wetness, you stopped me.  "Be gentle," you said.  "I've never done this 


I was shocked.  "All those boyfriends...Jack...Markus... never..." was all I could manage.  You looked deep into my 


"I tried," you said, "but even when it got this far, I couldn't 

go through with it.  They still weren't you.  That's what finally 

broke up Tim and me...we got to this point, and he was where you are 

now, but I had to stop him.  He never forgave me for that.  But I just 

couldn't go through with it."

"I don't know what to say..."

"You don't need to say anything.  I know how you feel about me."  Your 

eyes were shining, almost filled with tears.

"You know this is isn't my first time."  I felt awful.  I knew that 

was the wrong thing to say, but I had tobe honest with you.

You only nodded, and pulled me a little farther into you.  I stopped, 

and pulled away a bit.  "This isn't safe..." but you nodded your head, 

a tear rolling out of your eye.  You managed a weak smile.  "Yes it 

is."  I knew then how thorough your planning had been, and how much 

this meant to you.  To me, I realized.

Then you pulled again, and I slid forward, into you, almost effort-

lessly.  I heard your gasp and felt your hands leave my waist and

slide up to my shoulders.  Your nails dug into me slightly as our hips

touched, and I raised my head up enough to look into your eyes, as

tears streamed from them in happiness.  We kissed the light kiss of

intimacy, our tongues playing on each other's, and then plunged into a

passionate lock. 

I felt joy as I never had with any other woman.  I knew then that we 

belonged to each other, and always would, and that making love with you 

would always remind me of the stream and this pond.  I knew that we 

would forever be lovers in the forest, not caring if we ever found our 

way out.



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