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Archive-name: First/firsts.txt

Archive-author: Jon Van

Archive-title: My Sexual Biography - A Story of Firsts

   Everything depicted below, be it places, names, characters,

   expressions or opinions, are fictional and is to be regarded as

   fiction. Similarity between aforementioned places, names, characters,

   expressions or opinions and real events is purely coincidental

   and unintentional.

   The contents of this material is in no way intended to be

   derogatory, demeaning or humiliating towards any of the sexes or

   any kind of sexual behaviour. Neither are the use of specific words

   meant to be derogatory.

   Criticism, encouragement, suggestions, ideas, requests and in fact,

   ALL kinds of feedback, are greatly appreciated.


     My name is Jon Van.  I am a 47 year old bisexual male.  The following

stories are the highlights of my sexual self-discovery.  I hope that you

enjoy reading about my sexual self-exploration as much as I did living and

writing about it.


     My first sexual experience was with George when I was 16 years old.

George and I had been best buddies since 1st grade.  A couple of years

before this experience, we had started to get what we called "skin mags and

screw books" at a cigar store/newsstand in a city close by.  Our practice

was to "sleep out" and read the magazines and books.  For a long time after

starting to read the porno nothing happened.

     It was during our summer vacation and after spending the day at the

beach (George was a life guard), we decided to come back to the park to

sleep out.  We went home to assemble our camping gear and told our parents

that we were going to spend the night at the state park.  We loaded up our

motor bikes and returned to the park.  We picked a primitive camp site well

away from other campers and set up camp.  After we had dinner, we lit the

gas lantern and pulled out the "skin books".

     After reading explicit stories and gazing at the pictures of bare

breasts and pussies, we started talking about how horny we were.  As

teenagers will, we started talking about "I'm so horny I'd screw .... (fill

in the name of an unattractive girl we both knew)."  What was different

that night was that my friend said he was so horny he could "beat his meat

in public".  I said, "Aw, get outta here, you wouldn't."  He replied,

"Wanna bet?"  He then proceeded to bring his cock out of his shorts.  His

cock was as hard as a rock.  He started moving his hand slowly up and down

his cock.  He was staring at me as if to say "you're chicken".

     I was mesmerized by the slow motion of his hand and the obvious

pleasure that he was getting.  Feeling my face burning red and very

confused, I slowly unzipped my shorts and pulled out my cock.  It, too, was

hard and was wet on the end.  I started to pull and massage my cock.  I

looked up and saw my friend staring at my cock, so I returned my eyes to

his cock.  I began to feel an urge to touch his cock.  I wanted to put my

arms around him and feel his body against mine.

     Whether George was reading my mind or was just feeling similar things,

he moved first.  With his free hand, he reached over and put his hand over

my hand and started pumping along with my hand.  I let go of my cock and

reached over to grip his cock.  He let go of his cock and let me stroke it.

I was almost gasping for breath with tension and arousal.  His hand felt so

good.  George picked up the pace and closed his eyes, a look of pure bliss

on his face.  It wasn't very long until I could feel the pressure building

in my balls, I   looked into my friend's eyes.  The tingling sensation in

my balls suddenly traveled all the way up my back.  I felt hot and cold all

over.  I felt the cum spurting out of my cock.  Then, I felt George's cock

start to pulse and I felt his hot cum flowing down over my hand.

     I slowly withdrew my hand as George did the same.  We quickly wiped

ourselves off and stuffed our cocks back into our shorts, avoiding each

others eyes.  We quickly got ready for bed and turned off the gas lantern.

     I laid awake for a long time that night, and I think George did too.

The sensations and the feelings that this evening aroused in me, kept me

wake for hours.  The next morning, we packed up and headed home.  Neither

of us ever mentioned the incident again.  After college, we sort of drifted

apart, but I've always wondered about George.  I understand he never

married, and never really had a steady girl.  I will, however, always

treasure the memory of our sexual adventure and I hope George does too.


     My second sexual experience was much more conventional.  I had met a

girl by the name of Carol in high school chorus.  We started out joking

around a lot and moved to flirting.  I finally worked up the nerve and

asked her to the Homecoming Dance.  She accepted.  We got along great.  We

continued to go out together so it wasn't long before we were a "couple".

     I was still fairly naive about girls, despite the porno books and

magazines that I had read.  We had had several dates before I worked up the

courage to kiss her.  Carol was a "good" girl, so it was a long time before

we started seriously petting and necking.  Eventually, she allowed me to

unhook her bra and to pet her bare breasts.  Carol was not a large busted

girl but she was well proportioned.  I especially liked the way her nipples

hardened and extended when she was hot.

     It was the summer of my 18th year that Carol (who was 17) and I

finally went all the way.  We had been going together for about a year and

a half.  The previous winter I had persuaded Carol into letting me to not

only kiss and suck on her breasts but to finger-fuck her as well.

Recently, she had even consented to giving me a hand job when I complained

about getting "blue balls".

     We had gone to a romantic movie at the drive-in and were driving home.

We had petted and necked a lot during the movie, so when I suggested that

we stop at a deserted farm, she readily agreed.  After we had parked the

car, I got a blanket out of the back seat and spread it out on the ground.

At first, we just lay on the blanket, cuddling close and talking about "our


     We started kissing very passionately and I put my arms around her.

She responded by opening her mouth and dueling her tongue with mine.  My

cock by now had gotten hard and we started to grind our hips together.

After a few moments of this, I started fumbling with her bra.  She let me

unhook it.  I broke the kiss and lifted her shirt and bra.  Her pert

breasts were very beautiful in the moonlight.  I lowered my mouth to her

left nipple and began to lick and suck on it.  The nipple slowly came erect

and Carol started to breath heavily.  I loved the soft but firm texture of

her breasts and nipples.  As I switched to the other breast, I rolled Carol

over on her back.  With both her arms now free, she threw her arms around

my head pulled my face tightly against her breasts.  I was in heaven.

     I slowly worked my hand across her stomach to her jeans and started to

unbutton the fly.  Carol either didn't notice or didn't care because I got

the fly all the way open and worked my hands down inside the panties.  I

could feel the pubic hair and the beginning of her pussy lips but I

couldn't go any further because her pants were so tight.  I lifted my head

from her breasts and said, "Honey, let me get your pants off....".  She

looked at me blankly for a moment and then lifted her hips off the blanket.

I quickly pulled her pants and panties off and returned to her breasts with

my mouth.  I moved my hand down to her pussy without any restriction.  I

slowly began to feel my way around.  I put my finger between her pussy lips

and found that she was very wet.  I started to explore for her clit.  All

the time I was also licking and sucking on her breasts.  Carol started

moaning and whispering, "Oh, Jon that feels good, don't stop".

     My cock was so hard and big I thought it would burst out of my pants,

but I didn't want to break the spell, so I continued to nurse her breast

and feel for her clit.  At last when I found it, Carol jumped and let out a

louder moan.  I started to massage it with my thumb and found her hole with

one of my other fingers and slowly inserted it.  Carol was panting and

moaning so loudly now that I thought the whole world would hear.  As I

finger-fucked her, I whispered in her ear to undo my fly and take my cock

out.  At first I don't think she understood, but then she started fumbling

with my fly.  I moved my hand from her pussy only long enough to unzip my

fly and pull out my cock.  She grabbed it and began to squeeze and massage

it.  "Gently, gently", I whispered.  After I resumed finger-fucking her, I

put my lips close to her ear and said, "Let's go all the way."

     At first she didn't respond but after I asked again, she nodded her

head.  I put my mouth on hers and kissed her deeply.  I jumped up and

quickly peeled off my pants and lay down between her legs.  I was just to

the point of entering her when I remembered I had no rubber on.  I reached

over to my pants and pulled the rubber out of the pocket where I always

kept it.  I quickly put it on and again laid down between her legs.  I

began kissing her breasts again as I took my cock in hand and found her

pussy hole.  I slowly pushed my cock in.  She was very wet, so my cock

slipped in without too much resistance.  I transferred my mouth to hers and

began to kiss her.  Carol seemed to be enjoying it without any pain, so I

pushed all the way in.  Carol grunted and again threw her arms around my

neck.  I started to slowly work my cock in and out.  It felt great, warm

and soft, yet tight and exciting.  I tried to go slowly, to hold back so

Carol would be able to cum too.  Soon Carol started to move with me.  Her

hips began to get into the rhythm and her breathing came quicker as her

arms tightened around me.  Rubber or no, I knew I couldn't last very long,

I could feel the gathering tightness in my balls.  Carol started to moan

again and whisper, "Harder, go in all the way, do it faster!"  So I let

myself go and started to piston my hips.

     Carol resumed kissing me and started to buck her hips harder.  I knew

she was close but when she lifted her hips and back off the blanket and

ground her pussy on my cock, I knew she was cumming.  This set me off and I

could feel the tingling, hot and cold sensation build from my balls up my

back.  I could feel the cum traveling down my cock and spurting out.

     We lay there on the blanket, hot and sweaty, for several minutes.

Finally, when our breathing had returned to normal, she kissed me and

whispered that she loved me.  With my cock still inside her and

experiencing a wonderful afterglow, I whispered back that I loved her too.

     Many other sessions followed that summer.  That fall we became



     Carol and I got married after I had graduated from college.  I had

recently gotten a job at a local company and finally we could afford to get

married.  It was on our honeymoon that I first became addicted to oral sex.

     Our wedding was very traditional, so that it had been a long day by

the time we could get away.  We were both very tired.  Our wedding night

was spent in a motel about fifty miles from home.  We were both so

exhausted by then that we made love in a very mechanical way, more because

we were supposed to that because we wanted to.

     The next day we got on the road early and made it to our destination

just after noon.  We had reserved a cabin at a honeymoon resort.  Our

rustic cabin was very romantic, with a great view.  After unpacking, I took

her in my arms and kissed her deeply.  When we came up for air, Carol

giggled and said, "Now, lets make up for lost time".  Carol and I had

agreed to remain celibate for a month before our wedding to make the

honeymoon more special.

     Grinning, I responded, "And do we have a lot of making up to do".  I

had something special to try.  I wanted to go down on her but I wasn't sure

how she would react.

     I gathered her into my arms and resumed kissing her.  I started to

slowly unbutton her shirt while I continued the kiss.  I broke the kiss and

started trailing kisses across her cheek and over to her ear.  As I kissed

and blew in her ear, my hands remained busy removing her shirt and undoing

her bra.  I kissed and licked my way down her neck to her breasts.  By now

Carol, abandoning herself to my seduction whispered, "I love you."  As I

kissed and licked her breasts I undid her skirt and let it fall to the

floor.  I worked my way back up to her mouth and kissed her passionately.

We were holding each other tightly when I broke the kiss and looked into

her eyes.  "Let's take a shower together."  Grinning, she agreed.

     We raced into the bathroom and she started the shower going while I

got undressed.  She had her back to me adjusting the water, when, naked, I

grabbed her from behind.  I pressed my erection against her butt and

reached around to grab her breasts.  She laughed and pressed back against

me.  Backing away, I grabbed her panties and pulled them down to her

ankles.  Turning around, she took my hand and led me into the shower.

     We embraced under the cascading water.  She started grinding her hips

and stomach against my cock.  I kissed her and ran my hands slowly down

from her back to her butt.  Carol started to rub her entire body against


     After a few moments of the slipping and sliding embrace, I backed away

and grabbed the soap.  I quickly unwrapped it and started to wash her.  I

started with her neck and shoulders, massaging as much as washing, and

progressed to her breasts.  There I took my time, loving the slippery

feeling of her breasts and hard nipples as my hands slipped over them

repeatedly.  Reluctantly, I left her breasts and continued down to her

stomach and stopped just short of her pubic hair.  I turned her around and

washed her back.

     Carol said, "Now I know why lovers like to shower together."

     I expanded from her back to her butt and ran my soapy hands into her

crack and I gently massaged her anus and moved further to her pussy.  Carol

spread her legs and moaned a little.  Intent on teasing her more I stopped

and continued washing down her legs.  I moved around to the front of her

again and washed my way back up to her pubic area.  There I slowed down and

thoroughly washed the insides of her thighs and finally moved to wash her


     In all our love-making in the past, it had been in the dark, so this

was my first opportunity to look closely at her pussy.  I liked what I saw.

Her lips were swollen and the inner lips where just peeking out.  I spread

her outer lips and slowing and gently washed her.  I spent plenty of time

washing her clitoris and then moved to her lovely vagina.  By this time,

Carol was panting and gasping with passion.

     I stood up and pulled her into my arms.  She was still covered with

soap so I started rubbing my body against hers, like she had done to me

earlier.  We kissed and our tongues were intertwined as our bodies were.

     Reluctantly, I separated from her and started rinsing her off.  I

said, "Let's finish this in bed".  She nodded.  I quickly washed as Carol

got out of the shower and dried herself off.  I followed just a moments


     Back in the bedroom, I guided Carol to the edge of the bed and sat her

down.  Then kneeling in front of her I resumed kissing her mouth.  Again, I

kissed and licked my way down her front, paying special attention to her

breasts.  However, I didn't just stop there.  Carol was moaning softly and

panting in her arousal.  I gently laid her back on the bed with her legs

still over the edge.

     There before me was her pussy.  I looked closely at her "V" shaped

lips.  The outer lips were swollen with arousal, the inner lips glistening

with moisture.  I started by kissing her inner thighs and working my way

back to her pussy.  I thought that Carol was too far gone in her passion to

notice where I was heading.  Finally, I reached her pussy and inserted my

tongue between her lips and started to lick my way to her clitoris.  The

taste and smell were strange, very musky but very, very arousing.  Carol

pressed herself to my face.  As I found her clitoris, she jumped and let

out a loud moan.  "What are you doing, it feels so great", she gasped.

Having my mouth full, I just concentrated on what I was doing.

     I slid my tongue over her clit and forced the tip under the skin

covering her little erection.  As I savored the taste and feel, I continued

to massage her clit faster with the tip of my tongue.  I moved down to her

vagina and pushed my tongue inside.  Carol's hips were starting to buck and

push at my face.  I moved back up to her center of attraction and began to

rapidly lick and suck.  It took only a few moments of this before I could

feel Carol's lower stomach muscles begin to twitch and I could feel her

hole begin to contract spasmodically.  Carol yelled and started quivering

all over as she experienced her orgasm.  I continued to lick and suck, but

she pushed me away, saying "No, it's too much, stop!".

     I got into bed beside her and held her until she had recovered.  She

said, "That was wonderful, I've never felt anything so good in my life."

She reached over and put her hand on my cock.  "I want to make you feel as

good as you made me feel", she whispered.

     She moved over in the bed and motioned for me to get all the way on

the bed.  As I lay on my back, she got on her knees and started jacking my

cock. She bent over as if to look at it closely.  She leaned closer until,

sticking out her tongue, she licked the head.  My cock jumped and

stiffened.  It was a shock but a pleasant one.  She continued to lick her

way down the shaft and then back up.  Looking at me, she said, "I've heard

what a blow job is but I'm not sure how to do it."

     Knowing only what I had read in the porno books, I said, "Just put it

in your mouth, lick it and suck it."

     Slowly and hesitantly, she put my cock in her mouth and I felt her

tongue begin to rub my glans.  I almost lost it right there, but managed to

control myself.  She continued to slide my cock into her mouth, while she

continued to rub her tongue on the glans and underside of my cock.  She put

her hand around my cock and started to jack it.  It was all too much, I was

overwhelmed with the sensations she was giving me.  Especially sexy was the

sight of her bent over my cock, sucking on it.  I could feel the cum rising

in my balls, that familiar tightening sensation.  Before I could warn her,

I started to cum.  I could feel the cum spurting out and I could feel her

throat work to swallow my cum.  It seemed to go on for a long time and

Carol continued to jack my cock and lick and suck after I had finished.  I

finally had to stop her as I was too sensitive.

     Carol and I laid together snuggling afterward.  I asked her how she

liked my going down on her.  She said she had never thought anything could

feel so good.  That's when she told me that she had wanted me to do it, and

that she wondered if I would ever get around to the important parts.  We

talked about her going down on me.  Carol said she thought it was strange

but sexy.  She had been afraid of my cumming but it all happened so fast

and that I came before she knew it was happening.  She said that she and

her friends had talked about oral sex a lot.  These conversations had made

her curious and intent on trying it.

     Apparently, she and her friends discussed sex a lot.  Most of her

friends were married before us, so they had undertaken to inform Carol of

the joys of "kinky" sex.

     Carol and I both loved oral sex and it became a regular part of our



     My first true homosexual experience came a number of years after Carol

and I had been married.  Our marriage had fallen apart, sex was about the

only thing we had in common anymore, but that was starting to be few and

far between.  In fact, the sex didn't seem very satisfying anymore.  I had

just gotten out of the service and had started a new job where I traveled

around the country.  Maybe it was all the travel and trying to set up my

civilian career, but we had drifted apart and didn't seem interested in the

same things anymore.

     I had never really lost my interest in pornography, so I began to go

to porno book stores.  I found myself fascinated by some of the gay

magazines, so I picked up several.  I found that the pictures of naked men

together turned me on.  I thought back to the time George and I went

camping and wondered if I was gay.

     I became very concerned, as I didn't think I wanted to be gay, so I

went to the library to look up books on homosexuality.  I found a book that

described bisexuality, and it seemed to fit me to a "T".  I still admired

and desired females but I also admired and desired males.  It took a long

time for me to think through this transformation in my attitudes, but the

more I thought about it the righter it seemed for me.

     I now had to decide what to do about it.  Given that my marriage was

all but over, I had a long talk with Carol and we decided to divorce (I

didn't tell her about my bisexuality).  After we separated, I started to

look around for ways to enter the sub-culture of bisexuality.  In the

meantime I continued to indulge my fantasies with books and magazines.  I

even went so far as to get a dildo and tried to insert it when I


     I finally got my chance to experience a gay encounter when I was on a

business trip to New York.  I had recently purchased a book on gay meeting

places and decided to try a bar.  The bar was on Long Island about an hour

from my hotel.

     I was in my hotel room, getting ready to go to the bar.  I was trying

to decide what to wear.  I finally chose a tight pair of jeans and yellow

shirt.  I was really nervous.  The book said the bar didn't cater to any

special group, so I didn't know what to expect.  As I walked out to the

car, I almost turned back several times.  I finally got into the car and

started to drive in the direction of the bar.  While I was driving, I kept

running various scenarios through my mind.  How should I act?  What kind of

people would be there?  Would the men be wearing dresses?  I just didn't


     I finally arrived at the bar.  It seemed just like any other type of

neighborhood bar in a rather run down area.  I parked in a lot next to the

bar, screwed up my courage and walked in.

     I was amazed by how "normal" the place looked.  The bar seemed just

like any other bar except that it was somewhat empty and there were only

men in it (dressed quite normally).  I guess I was early for this place, it

was only 7:30.  I walked over to the bar and ordered a beer.  I swiveled

around in my chair and scanned the place.  Sort of dingy, and old but not a

slum.  There were several male couples at the tables talking.  There were

several singles at the tables and several at the bar.  I didn't know the

procedure of cruising (other than what I had read in porno books), so I

just drank my beer slowly and occasionally looked around.

     I'd been there about a half an hour when a middle aged man caught my

eye.  He had been looking at me when I was scanning the room and our eyes

met.  He smiled at me and lifted his drink.  I smiled back and lifted my

drink.  I resumed scanning the room.  A few minutes later, the man walked

up to me beside the bar and said, "Hi, my name is Steve.  You must new

around here".  I responded, "Yes, I am.  As a matter of fact, I'm in the

area on business."  He looked at my empty glass and said, "Here, let me get

you another beer."  He order the beer and suggested that I might be more

comfortable at one of the booths along the wall.

     We carried our beers to a booth and sat down.  He said, "So, what

brings you to a gay bar on Long Island?"  I tried to explain that I was new

to the gay scene and that I didn't quite know how to act.  He wasn't very

surprised at my inexperience and was very sympathetic.  He explained that

after a while it would be as natural as cruising a hetro bar.  I told him I

hadn't had much experience with that either.  I soon found myself telling

him about my life.  My experience with George.  My marriage and divorce.

He was a very good listener, making tactful comments.

     I had been talking for about an hour when I confessed that other than

George, I had had no gay experiences at all.  He talked for about 30

minutes giving me his general history.  He had always been gay.  His first

experience had been with an older man who worked as a gardener near where

he had grown up.  He made the remark that an older man was the best person

to break a "virgin" in.

     We had been in the bar close to two hours and the bar was getting full

and loud.  Steve suggested that he and I should go to his place where it

was quieter.  With my stomach in a knot, I agreed.  I told him that I would

follow him in my car.  As we got up, I could see that his cock was hard in

his pants.  I sure knew mine was.  I felt embarrassed, I thought that

everyone in the place was staring at us and knew that we would.....well I

wasn't sure what.  All I was sure of was that I was very aroused and

attracted the this gentle and understanding man.

     It took only a few minutes to drive to his place.  When we got out of

our cars, he came over and took my hand and led me up to the front door of

a small but nice house.  After we went in, he asked if I wanted anything to

drink.  I said, "Sure, a beer would be nice."  Steve said, "Coming right

up.  Sit down and make yourself comfortable."  I sat down and looked around

the room.  It seemed right out of the fifties.  Blond wood furniture,

prints on the walls and patterned wall paper.  The only modern thing in the

room was a high tech type of reel to reel stereo.  Steve came back into the

room gave me a can of beer.  He walked over to the stereo and put on a tape

of soft romantic music.  He then turned out all but one of the lights.  I

realized that he was seducing me.  I really appreciated the effort that he

was going to, as I was unsure of what to do and very nervous.

     Steve came over and sat beside me on the couch.  Not too close and not

too far away.  He stared talking about the gay scene on Long Island and

some of his experiences.  He apparently had a lover for almost ten years,

but it had ended several years previously.  I asked questions about how one

should cruise, where to cruise and how to recognize someone who was gay.

He answered most of my questions very wisely.  The only answer that

frustrated me was the one on recognizing other gays and if someone was

interested in me.  His answer was "Experience and feeling".  We had

finished our beers and Steve went to get more.

     When he came back, he sat a little closer to me and put his arm around

me.  I felt very comfortable with Steve and leaned into his arm.  We sat

like that for a while, just chatting.  Then when I turned my head to look

at him, he leaned over and kissed me.  It felt wonderful and strange, the

soft lips and the scratchy stubble.  Steve opened his mouth and gently

forced his tongue between my lips.  He tasted like beer and mint.  I put my

hand up behind his head and held his mouth to mine.  When the kiss broke, I

reminded him that I had no experience and that he would have to show me

what to do.  He chuckled and said, "Just let it flow naturally."  We had

kissed and cuddled on the couch for a while when Steve suggested that we

would be more comfortable in the bedroom.

     Steve got up and led me into his bedroom.  The room was small but

there was a king size water bed in the center.  Steve stripped the covers

back and then started to undress.  I just stood there staring at him.

Steve noticed me staring at him and laughed.  He came over to me and

started to undress me.

     He made the act of undressing me an erotic process.  He kissed my neck

while he undid my shirt and pulled it off me.  He ran his hands lightly

over my chest and reached down to unbuckle my jeans.  He kissed my nipples

while he pushed my pants down.  He got on his knees and pulled my briefs

down and lifted my feet to get them all off.  I stood there naked with him

kneeling in front of me.

     He took my hard cock and slowly and gently started to pump it.  He

leaned over and with just the tip of his tongue, he licked the wetness off

of the tip.  I shuddered, it felt so good.  He then took my cock into his

mouth and started to suck.  I had never had such a marvelous sensation.

Carol certainly could never have matched this.  He did things with his

tongue and lips that I couldn't believe.  I snapped out of my lust-filled

haze and realized that I didn't want to cum yet.  I put my hands on his

shoulders and said, "I don't want to cum yet".  "Ok, Let's get in bed." he


     Steve stood up and quickly got undressed.  He led me over to the bed,

and set me down on the edge.  I quickly got into the bed and scooted over

to give Steve room to get in.  As Steve lowered himself onto the bed, I got

my first good look at his cock.  It wasn't anything special, which was a

relief.  I was afraid of the monster cocks I had read about and seen in the

porno books.

     As we settled down next to each other, we rolled into each others

arms.  We started to kiss passionately.  Our tongues exploring each other's

mouths.  His arms held me tightly.  We were pressed against each other,

chest to chest, cock to cock.  The feeling of his cock against mine was

such a thrill, that I almost came.  It seemed that we kissed and rubbed our

cocks together for a long time, and I was getting hotter and hotter.  Steve

broke the kiss and then whispered in my ear, "You are so sexy, I could do

this forever, but I want to suck that cock again."  I just nodded mutely.

     We disentangled ourselves and Steve reversed himself.  As he lay down

and before he started to suck, he said, "You don't have to suck me, do it

only if you want to."  Then he went down on me.  The sensations were

marvelous.  He had an educated mouth.  After a few minutes, I opened my

eyes to see his cock a few inches for my face.  I tentatively put my hand

around it and started to jack it.  It was wet on the tip.  I put out my

tongue and tasted it.  I was surprised, it didn't have much of a taste,

just a little salty.  Steve was doing such a wonderful job on my cock, I

wanted to return the feelings.  So I mustered my courage and inserted the

tip in my mouth.  It was strange, a soft hardness.  Soft and spongy outside

and rock hard underneath.  Slowly, I tried to copy what he was doing to me.

He took his mouth off of me for a moment and whispered, "Gently and watch

the teeth".  So, I said ok and tried to gently lick and suck his cock.  His

hips started to gently move back and forth forcing the cock in and out of

my mouth.  I started to enjoy this feeling, my cock being sucked and

sucking someone else's cock simultaneously.  I started to move my hips back

and forth as I felt the familiar tightness in my balls.  It was all

happening too quickly.  The tingling started and before I could stop it, I

was cumming in his mouth.  He just hummed and slowed his movements.  It was

only a moment or two later that I could feel Steve's cock start to pulse

with his orgasm.  Suddenly my mouth was filling with Steve's cum.  The

taste again wasn't bad, just different, musky with a sort of tang to it.

     Steve raised himself off of the waterbed and smiled at me.  "Not bad

for a beginner," he said.  I felt drained and warm.  Steve got up and

turned around.  He laid down beside me and we started to cuddle in each

other's arms.  "Stay the night," he said.  As the next day was Saturday, I


     We talked for a few minutes about how nice the sex was and I soon

found myself drifting off to sleep in his arms.

     The next morning when we awoke, Steve suggested that we take a shower

together.  So we brushed our teeth and jumped into the shower.  Steve got

into the shower first, started the water and smiled at me, inviting me in.

I went into the shower and we hugged each other under the hot water.  Our

cocks began to grow hard as we kissed.  After a few moments, Steve grabbed

the soap and began to soap me up.  He did it slowly and sensuously.  After

he had soaped up my body, I had gotten very aroused but I wanted to return

the favor, so I slipped under the water and took the soap.  I started to

soap him up the same way he had done to me.  It was a strange feeling,

touching a hairy, firm body.  I took my time exploring his body, I had

never touched another male like this and it was a very erotic experience.

It was so different from caressing a woman.  I took my time soaping up his

cock, examining it closely.  I was fascinated with it, it was circumcised

like mine but it was different.  It wasn't as thick as mine and the head

was smaller.  There were thick veins running up from the base.  I didn't

neglect his balls either, they were large and heavy.  Suddenly, Steve

grabbed my shoulders and pulled me away from his cock and balls.  "I don't

want to cum yet," he smiled.  "Besides, I want to give you some lessons in

gay sex!" he added.  We quickly rinsed off and got out of the shower.

     Steve suggested we take a breather and get some coffee.  So naked, we

headed to the kitchen.  As we were waiting on the coffee to brew, Steve

started to explain the mechanics of a blow job.  I hadn't realized that

there is an art to a good BJ.  He went on the explain about how a man's

nipples are sexy but they just need to be treated rougher than a woman's.

     The coffee had finished so we both got a cup.  As we smoked and drank

our coffee, Steve explained how gays fuck.  He explained about using a good

lubricant and how it was always safer to use a rubber.  All this talking

was getting me hot, so I suggested that we do something about it.  "OK!",

he agreed with enthusiasm.

     When we had gotten back into bed, he said, "I want you to fuck me this

time, but first let's get each other worked up!"  I was thrilled at his

statement, but said, "I'll be glad to do it, and you've explained how, but

now you'll have to show me."  He reached his arms out and drew me to him

saying, "That's half the fun."  Then he gently kissed me and I opened my

mouth to his skilled tongue.  I could feel his cock poking me in the

stomach as we fell back on the bed.  His mouth was so wonderful, that I

didn't want him to stop, but he broke the kiss and started to pinch and

pull at my nipples.  There was a little pain, but more pleasure.  So, I put

my lips on his nipples and started to lick and bite.  "Harder!", he moaned.

I increased the pressure and started to pinch and pull at his other nipple

with my hand.  "Oh, yes!", he said.  After a few moments of this, Steve

said, "I want you to get me ready to fuck.  I want you to suck me but first

get some of that KY jelly and a rubber from the dresser."

     I got up and went to the dresser where he had pointed.  I got the tube

of KY and a rubber that was right beside it.  I looked at Steve

questioningly as I returned to the bed.  "Put some on your fingers and rub

it on and around my asshole and then suck me."

     Steve spread his legs and I did as I was told.  I looked closely as I

spread the KY around.  His brown hole was soft with a hairy fringe around


     "That feels wonderful.  Make sure you have plenty on your fingers and

slowly and gently put a finger in." he said.  As gently and slowly as I

could, I inserted my finger in his rectum.  I could feel the strong muscle

and the soft lining past the muscle.  "That feels very good," Steve moaned,

"Now suck my cock!"

     Remembering Steve's hints on technique, I started to suck his cock.

The taste and feel of his cock was just as wonderful as last night.  With

my other hand I gripped his cock and I held him gently in my mouth with my

lips curled over my teeth.  I used my tongue, rubbing it on the underside

of his cock.  I took my mouth off his cock and licked my way down to his

balls.  I took one of the balls in my mouth and gently rolled it around.

Steve started to moan and I switched to the other ball and started jacking

him with my hand.  I returned to my main interest and just put the end of

his cock in my mouth and continued to jack him off.  I ran my tongue around

the end of his glans and tasted his pre-cum.  Remembering my other hand I

started to move my finger slowly in and out of his ass.  After a few

minutes, he moaned, "Wow, you learn quickly.  Now, put another finger in,

gently".  I pulled out my finger and slowly worked in two fingers.  I was

getting very aroused and no one had touched my cock yet!

     Suddenly, Steve said, "Stop, or I'll cum.  I want your cock in my

ass!"  I slowly withdrew my hand and let his cock slip from my lips.  I

picked up the rubber from where it had dropped on the bed.  As I was

rolling it on, Steve said, "Put plenty of KY on the rubber and spread it

out all over.  Put more in my ass and then we'll be ready".

     I followed his directions and then Steve rolled over on his stomach.

"Gently and slowly put it in, I'll tell you if you are going too fast."

Steve said in a voice muffled by the bed.  I got between his legs and

slowly put my cock against his asshole.  "A little higher." he said.  I

adjusted my position and started to slowly push in.  I could feel the

resistance as I continued to push.  Then suddenly I was past the muscle and

I slid smoothly in.  The hot tight sensation was great, I felt as if my

cock was being burned through the rubber.  It was tighter and hotter than

any woman ever was.  Steve hissed and then said, "Just stay still for a few

moments while I adjust to you.  You've got an enormous, thick cock!"

     After a few moments, Steve said, "Ok, go slowly".  I slowly started to

move my cock in and out of his ass.  I could feel the tingling sensation

starting already.  I murmured to Steve, "I'm too close, I can't take it".

Steve said, "Just lay still for a few minutes, I need to catch up to you".

I could feel Steve working his hand under him and he started to masturbate.

I could feel the urgency of my orgasm lessening.  I reach under Steve and

found his nipples and started to pinch and pull as he had taught me.

     Soon Steve said, "All right, go ahead, fuck me."  So, I started to

slowly work my cock in and out of his ass.  Steve started to mumble and I

couldn't quite make out what he was saying other than an occasional "good".

I kept to a slow pace even though I wanted to just let loose for all I was

worth.  "Faster, harder!" Steve cried.  My control slipped away at his

command.  I started to saw in and out as hard and fast as I could.  The

familiar tingling started again but time seemed to slow, the orgasm seemed

to take forever.  I could feel the separate pulses of cum all the way from

my balls to the tip of my cock.  Finally, it was over and I collapsed on

Steve's back.

     When our breathing returned to normal, Steve turned his head around

and smiled, "You sure don't need any instruction on how to fuck an ass!"  I

thanked Steve for the compliment and slowly pulled out.  I collapsed on the

bed next to Steve and we cuddled for a while.

     Sometime later, Steve suggested that we get up and shower again.

After we had washed each other again, I was hard but Steve said I would

have to wait a while, for him to recharge his batteries.

     We spent most of the weekend talking and making love like two

newlyweds.  Finally, late Sunday afternoon I told Steve I had to be getting

back.  I gave him my phone number at the motel and he gave me his.  Steve

worked odd shifts, so the soonest we could arrange to get back together was

the next weekend.  Steve's parting words were enough to keep me thinking of

the rendezvous all week.  He said, "Your next lesson will be how to get


     Finally, Friday arrived.  I called Steve several times that week,

talking about little things and sex.  I showed up at Steve's house Friday

after work.  I suggested that we go out to dinner as a way of repaying him

for all the food I had eaten last weekend.  Steve said, "Look, there is no

way I could repay you for the happiness you gave me last weekend, so let's

not start out figuring who owes who.  Besides I have spent hours fixing us

a nice dinner."  Sheepishly I agreed, "You're right, we're friends and

lovers not business partners."

     Steve led me into the kitchen and I helped him to finish the

preparations for dinner.  We ate right there in the kitchen.  The meal that

he had fixed was delicious.  As we consumed the swiss steak, scalloped

potatoes and salad, we talked of the news and his job (he managed a movie


     Finally, as we were lighting cigarettes, our talk turned to the main

thing on my mind.  I said, "Look, I'm kind of nervous about tonight.  I

bought a dildo a couple of months ago and I've tried to use it but well,

I'm just not sure about all this."

     Steve looked at me with understanding.  "Jon, it's not easy the first

time but it's worth it.  I'm glad to hear that you've tried it with a

dildo, that'll make things easier.  We'll just take it slow and easy.  If

it gets to be too much than I'll stop.  Ok?"  "Ok", I replied.

     Steve got up from the table and took my hand.  He pulled me up and

pulled me to him.  As he hugged me, I felt a little better.  Steve released

me and lead me into the bedroom.  Still nervous, I started to get

undressed.  By the time I had gotten naked, Steve was naked and getting the

tube of K-Y jelly and a couple of rubbers from a dresser drawer.  He put

them on the bedside table and turned to me.  "Come here" he whispered.  "I

can see that you're nervous and a little afraid, let's just start slow and

easy".  He drew me into his arms and began to kiss me, slowly his tongue

explored my mouth.  I could feel his cock rising and getting hard.

Suprisingly, my cock started to stir, I was so nervous, I wasn't sure that

it would.

     Steve slowly guided me to the bed, continuing the kiss.  As we both

sat down on the bed, he started to lightly kiss my neck and shoulders.  He

was running his hands over my chest and back.  It felt so good and the

nervousness was slowly draining out of me.  He maneuvered me into the bed

and climbed in beside me.  I was on my back and he was on his knees.  He

began to lick my cock.  My cock was hard and his tongue caresses made it

all the harder.  He took my cock into his mouth and began to slowly move up

and down.  He wrapped one hand around my cock and the other started to

gently fondle my balls.  Everything was in slow motion, the wet warm mouth

engulfing my cockhead and his hand forming a tube to caress my shaft.  I

was beginning to float on the wonderful sensations he was giving me.

     After a few more minutes of a wonderful blow job, he raise up and

reached for the K-Y jelly.  "I'm going to start to loosen you up now", he

murmured.  I felt the shock of the cold jelly as he massaged it into and

around my anus.  Steve returned to the blow job as I felt his finger begin

to press against my hole.  I must have tensed up because Steve left my cock

and said in a soft voice, "Relax.... Relax.... Relax, try to open up."  I

tried to relax the muscles there.  Steve said, "Good, just relax, bear down

a little, like you are going to take a shit".  I did as he suggested and

his finger moved in easily.  This wasn't much different than when I tried

to use the dildo on myself, so I just relaxed and enjoyed the sensations.

Steve returned to my cock and began to move his finger in and out.  After a

while Steve started pushing in a second finger and it went in easily too.

"This will feel like nothing else you have ever felt" Steve said as he

started pressing up with his fingertips.  A wonderful feeling started as he

started massaging my prostrate.  I wondered if this was how a woman felt

with a man inside her.  Steve was continuing to slowly jack my cock.

     Finally, Steve said, "I think you're ready, trust me I'll go slow and

stop whenever you want".  He reached over and picked up a rubber and slowly

rolled it over his cock.  He then applied K-Y jelly to the whole cock and

put another cold glob in and over my anus.  He turned me over and spread my

legs.  I could feel his cock rubbing between my cheeks and then pressing

against my anus.  Trying to relax as he pressed, I suddenly felt a sharp

pain and the head of his cock slipped past my sphincter.  I sharply drew in

my breath and Steve stopped.  "We'll just wait here a while until you can

adjust", he whispered.  He started to gently rub my back and arms.  After a

few moments, the pain subsided, "It feels better now", I said.  Actually,

it was more than just better, it was beginning to feel quite good.

     Steve resumed the pressure and slowly slid in the rest of the way.  He

lowered himself on to me and began kissing the back of my neck and licking

my ears.  I could feel his balls up against my skin.  I felt full and warm

with Steve covering me.  His tongue was waking new fires as it licked my

ears and neck.  Steve started moving his cock back and forth slowly.  I

could feel his balls bounce against my skin every time he pushed in.  He

was slowly picking up the rhythm and it felt great.  My cock was being

slowly rubbed against the sheet under me and his cock moved in and out.

This was beyond any expectation that I had.  I felt lustful and at the same

time, covered and protected.  My hips started to take a life of their own.

They started to move in sync with Steve's strokes.  Steve moaned, "God, you

feel great, you have such a hot ass, I won't be able to hold off very

long".  Steve kept up the slow, even rhythm and I could feel the familiar

warmth start building in my balls as my cock rubbed against the sheets.  I

started to push back against his cock harder and I started to moan and

encourage Steve, "That feels great, don't stop, do it faster, harder...".

Steve picked up speed and force and was soon fucking hard and fast, his

balls slapping against my skin.  I couldn't stop it, I could feel the

warmth begin in my balls and spread to my spine.  But it was different, the

warm and tingly feeling spread out over my whole body, giving me goose

bumps.  I could feel the cum flowing out of my cock and I shivered with the

wonderful warm sensation.

     Steve continued sawing in and out of my ass as the feeling began to

subside.  It still felt good but my orgasm was past.  It wasn't but a

minute or so until Steve started grunting and lunged hard into my ass.

"I'm cumming", he groaned.  I could feel the pulsations of his cock as his

orgasm took him.

     We lay there for a while as our breathing quieted.  I had never felt

so drained and yet I felt good, warm and intimate.  Steve began to pull out

slowly.  My ass gave a little spasm as his cock pulled out.  I rolled over

and looked into Steve's eyes.  "I love you", I whispered.  Steve smiled and

said, "And I love you, too.  Did you cum?"  I nodded and he smiled.

"You're a natural, you know that?" he asked.  "I have a good teacher", I

replied, smiling.

     Steve and I spent the next four months together as often as we could.

In addition to teaching me how to make love to a man, to suck, to fuck and

to be fucked, Steve taught me that two men can love each other emotionally

and physically, just as a man and a woman can.

     Eventually the work I had on Long Island was finished and Steve and I

tearfully parted.  I still write to him to this day and call him

frequently.  He has a new lover these past five years and seems very happy.


     Well, that has been my sexual history, at least the highlights.  I had

several lovers since Steve and Carol, one woman and two men.  I'm not

currently involved with anyone right now.  I hope to try a threesome in the

future.  That's my current fantasy.  I know with AIDS that it will probably

remain just that, a fantasy.  I'll let you all know if it happens.

               Jon Van



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