Archive-name: Miscell/fnork.txt

Archive-author: 

Archive-title: Fnorking





                     A History of an Aberrent Sexual Contest



     "Fnorking" is a colloquial term for contests involving females inserting

small dead animals into their vaginas. All known instances involving "fnorking"

have occurred on college campuses. The contests dealt with several females

competing to insert as many animals as possible into their vaginas, the winner

being the one able to insert more than any of the other contestants. The winner

of the contest was sometimes crowned the "fnork" queen.

     The earliest known incidences of "fnorking" occurred in the late 1920's.

The phenomenon seems to have been an outgrowth of the goldfish eating fad

prevalent at that time. Most goldfish eating contests involved college age

males consuming as many live goldfish as possible. The female collegians of

that time were less inhibited than preceding generations of females and

developed their own version of this fad. They held contests involving the

insertion of as many goldfish as possible. The goldfish were most often

inserted while live. Contest were held late at night in college dormitories,

although there is a report of one contest being held in broad daylight beside a

well stocked pond. This contest is said to have involved at least twenty-five

females and the winner was able to "consume" twenty-seven goldfish.

     All known "fnorking" contests seem to have been held at exculsively female

colleges and universities, although, considering the segregation of males and

females at schools in this time period, this is not unusual. "Fnorking" seems

to have been an outgrowth of the general loosening of morals in the 20's era

and the woman's sufferage movements of the early part of that decade. The less

inhibited females of the era were more inclined to enter such bizarre contests.

     As the fad progressed, the contests were not limited to just goldfish but

were expanded to include other specie of small animals. It is known that

contests were held involving the "fnorking" of hamsters, gerbils, lizards,

salamanders, frogs, small birds and even one contest involving chipmunks. All

of the above contests involved dead animals. The preferred method of killing

the animals was suffocation. The contests were held immediately after the

animals were killed because they were "still warm and still very pliable."

     The phenomenon seems to have disappeared after the turn of the decade.

This is possibly because of the depression era when less females were attending

colleges and also morales experienced a general regression. No known incidences

of "fnorking" have been reported until very recent times.

     Recent reports have eminated from the Florida area and from Europe,

specifically at the 1991 "spring break" in Florida and one incidence in 1989 in

Denmark involving sixty college age females inserting frogs in a day long

contest. There were reports of three contests in the Miami area in 1991, two

involving insertion of goldfish and one the insertion of small toy stuffed

animals. The winner of one of the goldfish contests was able to insert twelve

fish and is reported to have recieved a cash prize in the amount of five

hundred dollars.

     Interview's of 1920's era females involved in "fnorking" contests indicate

that no prizes were awarded in the contests, of that period. The females stated

that most entered the contests due to peer pressure. They also indicated that

the contests were held in conjunction with college fraternity initiations. 

     The origin of the word "fnork" is very hard to discern. All of the females

interviewed stated that "it was always called that." One woman did offer as an

explanation that "fnork" is formed from the first letters of greek words

describing the activity. At this time I have not been able to discover the

words used, if there are any. No written descriptions of the activity have been

brought to light, although, considering the type of activity, this is not

unusual. All of the females interviewed were very reluctant to admit to being

in the contests.

     Considering the recent resurgance of the "fnorking" phenomenon, it is

possible that the general lessening of sexual inhibitions in females in recent

times has allowed the fad to resurface. In this day of personal video, how soon

will some enterprising person make a record of one of these interesting

contests?



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